I realize I’ve posted a lot about feeling low during these many, many, MANY days of NaBloPoMo (seriously, will November ever end?!), but that is reality of grief, especially during the latter months of every year.
I woke up feeling so melancholy this morning, like Thanksgiving was a letdown even though I wasn’t even particularly looking forward to it. That, too, is the reality of grief during this season.
Three things happened today that helped.
First, I asked my four-year-old Jackson what he would like to do to celebrate Hudson’s birthday next week. He said, “Make a love cake, because we miss her.” I burst into tears, and he came over to me, crawled into my lap, and let me hug him for the longest time. He kept asking me if I needed something to wipe my face with, which made me laugh through my tears (and like Truvy, that’s my favorite emotion).
Second, we did this to our house. My dearest husband spent several hours hanging lights on the house while the kids helped me string them on the picket fence across our front yard. It would be hard for me not to be cheered by this sight. It will be even better when I get the garland hung on the front porch. Have I mentioned that I love Christmas, even in spite of it all?
Third, I asked my Facebook friends for suggestions for a lighthearted movie Ed and I could watch (I love me some Jessica Jones, but I couldn’t stomach two hours of that darkness tonight), and they suggested “Chef,” which I’d never heard of. If you haven’t seen it, get thee to it quickly. Jon Favreau and Jon Leguizamo, with appearances by Oliver Platt, Robert Downey, Jr., and Dustin Hoffman. It was funny and sweet–just the right antidote to melancholy, at least for a few hours. Be careful if you are vegetarian–it will either gross you out or make you desperately crave some meat.
Even on the hard days, sometimes the littlest things can help.